Emotional Intelligence: The ABCs of Emotions
Part 1: Emotions: God’s Idea
Introduction: You’re reading Part 1 in a blog mini-series on Emotional Intelligence. I’ve developed this series from material in my book Soul Physicians: A Theology of Soul Care and Spiritual Direction.
Emotions: God’s Idea
In many Christian circles, emotions are viewed as the “black sheep” of the image bearing family. In other words, we accept that God created us with a soul to relate, with a mind to think, and with a will to choose. But somehow we act as if emotions were not God’s idea.
We often see emotions more as a cursing than a blessing. “More harm than good.” “Suppress them.” “Ignore them.” “Don’t have them.” If emotions are so distressing, then why did God create us with feelings?
Somehow we’ve forgotten that when God paused to ponder His image bearers, he pointed out that they, emotions included, were “very good.”
Feelings were God’s idea. Not only did He give them to us; He experiences them Himself. God is an emotional being. Read that again. Don’t dodge it. God is an emotional being. God the Father gets angry. God the Son weeps. God the Spirit grieves. The Trinity emotes.
If we are to live godly lives—Christ-like lives—then we need God’s perspective on emotions. We need a biblical theology on emotionality. Consider the present blog mini-series to be our Emotional Primer 101—the ABCs of Emotions.
Emotions: Windows to the Soul
It’s so typical that it has become trite, “How do you feel about that?” We even mock it, “I feel your pain.” We are awash in an emotionally shallow society. Do we throw the baby out with the bath water? Or do we realize Satan’s counterfeit and choose Christ’s real deal, the genuine article?
The real deal is imago Dei emotionality. The real deal is coram Deo emotionality. Like our Creator, we are emotional beings who experience deeply (imago Dei emotionality) and all of our feelings are in-relationship-to-God feelings (coram Deo emotionality).
Emotions are windows to the soul. All emotions, positive or painful, open doors to the nature of reality. Emotions link our inner and outer world. But we want to escape the reality of both. The Scriptures teach that the suppression of feelings is a refusal to face the sorrow of life and our hunger for heaven. It is not a mark of maturity. Our refusal to embrace our feelings is an attempt to deal with a God who does not relieve our pain.
Our emotions reveal our deepest questions about God. They vocalize the inner working of our souls. Listen to and ponder your emotions in order to discern what your heart is doing with God and others. They are a voice that can tell us how we are dealing with a fallen, hurtful world. Emotions force open the stuck window of our soul, compelling us to face how we are facing life.
Emotions: Fearfully and Wonderfully Made
Emotions are God-given. They are not satanic. Adam had them before the Fall. God has them. Christ has them. In and of themselves, they are not sinful. They are beneficial, and yes, even beautiful.
The Psalmist understood this. In the classic passage describing God’s utmost care in creating us, Psalm 139, emotionality is the one aspect of our inner personality specifically referenced. “For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb” (Psalm 139:13, emphasis added).
“Inmost being” is kidneys. In Psalm 73:21 and Proverbs 23:16 the kidneys are the place of sorrow and rejoicing, respectively. In Old Testament thinking, the kidneys prompt or urge to action by aroused emotions. Hans Wolff notes that the Semitic languages used terms for kidneys, reins, stomach, bowels, and womb to describe the feeling states (Wolff, Anthropology of the Old Testament, pp. 62-63).
As we literally experience and feel an emotion in our physical being, so we feel an emotion in our psychological being. That’s why we say things like, “I have butterflies in my stomach.” God created your inmost being, your kidneys, your emotions. Your emotions are fearfully and wonderfully made—by God.
The Rest of the Story
Knowing that God designed us with emotions is the beginning of the story. The rest of the story teaches us what emotions are. Return for Part 2, Why We Feel What We Feel, as we define emotions and develop a basic formula for understanding emotions.
Join the Conversation
Why do you think Christians fear feelings? How does it change your thoughts about your feelings when you realize that emotions were God’s idea?
Thank you so much for this post! I’m going to pass it along and I am looking forward to reading the rest of the series.
I think believers sometimes fear that their emotions will ‘get the better of them.’ I appreciated this post and agree that God made us with emotions and that they are good. However, ‘feelings’ are not reliable. I am a weak sinner in need of grace and my feelings are not always truthful. I have to consciously rely on the Word of God, which IS reliable, and by God’s grace submit my emotions to His truths. I’m looking forward to the next installment. 🙂
Cristina,
Thanks for your post. I agree that we rely on God’s Word first and foremost. I would add that our thinking and choosing are also unreliable. In fact, there are far more verses in the Bible about not trusting our fleshly/fallen thinking/choosing/mind/will than there are on not trusting our feelings. Any aspect of our “inner being” is unreliable apart from Christ. But in Christ, our emotions, along with our thoughts and our wills and our affections, when submitted to God’s Word and God’s Spirit can be “reliable.” Keep reading.
Bob
I can’t speak for others, but I know for myself I though that if I were mature in my faith then I would experience constant peace reigning inside of me despite my circumstances. I had this idealistic view that nothing would phase me. This lead me to lying to myself about how I was feeling such as I’m not angry with my offender just hurt. However when my husband (ex now) left me for another woman and my world came crashing down around me I was devastated, and I grieved. God held on tight to me even though I felt He had deserted me! He proved Himself to be the greatest comforter, and faithful. Through it all I learned there is a time to grieve…a time to sorrow, and when we do God meets us there as a loving Father holding His hurting daughter or son. I also learned, am learning that anger is not sin, but how we respond when we are angry is what determines whether or not it is or will become sin. I’m learning too, that though God’s word may say to not be anxious that doesn’t mean I won’t be anxious or fearful. What it does mean is that I press all the more into Him in prayer and I do whatever it is that He has called me to do trusting He will work it out according to His will and plan not mine.
Thank-you for this series! I’m looking forward to reading more!
Just wanted to add one more thing…
A friend of mine recently reminded me that as a believer I am an overcomer and that overcomers well, they overcome.
Excellent series!!! A much-needed draught of cool water for the mind-set of our age!