A Word from Bob 

I’ve derived today’s post from The Annual Guide to Biblical Counseling Resources: 2022 Edition. The Biblical Counseling Coalition now oversees and distributes The Annual Guide. For 2022 (as for 2018-2021), I provided the collation and content. 

Today’s post follows-up on two recent posts:

• Shepherds Please Think, “Protect Well.” Please Stop Saying, “Suffer Well.”

• A Compassionate Biblical Approach to Suffering: “Biblical Sufferology” 

As the title of The Annual Guide suggests, the following 12 resources are written by, written for, or beneficial for biblical counselors.

Domestic Abuse Resources: Booklets

Nelson, Heather. Domestic Abuse: Help for Victims 

Do you suspect that you or someone you love is suffering from marital domestic abuse? Is there intentional harm happening to you in your home, whether physical, verbal, sexual, or emotional? What should you do? How do you seek help? Heather Nelson invites you to examine what is happening in your home and what steps to take if you feel unsafe and targeted for mistreatment by your spouse. She explains a typical cycle of abuse and acknowledges how difficult it can be to be honest about what you are experiencing. Heather urges you to understand how God sees you and thinks about you, and how he is with you to provide helpers, wisdom, and grace to see what steps you need to take to protect yourself and those you love. 

Newheiser, Jim. Help! Someone I Love Has Been Abused

Abuse is a growing problem, and those who have been abused need help. This mini-book equips the reader to offer compassionate biblical counsel to a victim of abuse. As well as providing practical instruction on how to help the victim gain safety and deal with the abuser in a biblical way, it points to the victory possible in Jesus Christ, who was abused for His people and who has compassion on all hurting people who turn to Him.

Strickland, Darby. Domestic Abuse: Help for the Sufferer

Domestic abuse is a heartbreaking and very prevalent issue and, sadly, it is no stranger to Christian marriages. Though they are filled with both oppressors and oppressed, many churches have little to say on this issue. If you are being oppressed, this can leave you feeling isolated and alone . . . but you’re not alone. Scripture has much to say about your experience, your safety, and God’s heart for you. He does not blame you for your suffering and does not tolerate oppression. In fact, He wants to rescue you. Experienced family counselor Darby Strickland helps you to cut through confusion, speak out, and find support, and then determine your next steps. God knows the suffering and wounds of oppression, and He delights in redeeming and rescuing His heartbroken children.

Strickland, Darby. Domestic Abuse: Recognize, Respond, Rescue

Abuse in a marriage is a difficult problem, but there is comfort in knowing that the Bible points the way toward answers. While it may not use the language of victims and abusers, it has plenty to say about the oppressed and their oppressors, and how much God opposes oppression. Experienced family counselor Darby Strickland shows counselors and concerned family and friends how to recognize and uncover abuse, then uses Scripture to show what is truly happening in oppressive marriages. She explains how abuse confuses the oppressed into thinking they are to blame, then equips us to be the wise, informed defenders and advocates they need. Learn how to walk patiently with victims and guide abusers toward repentance, through Strickland’s concrete suggestions for comforting and protecting the oppressed while reorienting the heart of the oppressor.

Welch, Ed. Living with an Angry Spouse: Help for Victims of Abuse 

You married someone you trusted, and now you are facing unpredictable anger or outright physical abuse. This is betrayal at its worst. Most likely you are numb, scared, confused, and paralyzed. How do you take a step when you are so afraid? Ed Welch shares how hope and change come from knowing the God who hears you and promises to deliver you. He has the power to fill you with his love—a love that is patient, kind, and says no to injustice. As you are guided by God’s love, you will have the courage to take the practical steps outlined in this booklet.  

Domestic Abuse Resources: Books 

Dryburgh, Anne. Debilitated and Diminished: Help for Christian Women in Emotionally Abusive Marriages

Debilitated and Diminished is written for those who are seeking to help Christian women who are being emotionally abused by their husbands. It provides a definition of emotional abuse, describes the behaviors involved and the effects of these behaviors upon the victim. A biblical approach for helping these women is proposed that looks at human nature, marital roles, and what it means for her to live in Christ. Suggestions are given as to how the church can be a support to the emotionally abused woman.

Hambrick, Brad, Editor. Becoming a Church That Cares Well for the Abused 

Is your church prepared to care for individuals who have experienced various forms of abuse? As we continue to learn of more individuals experiencing sexual abuse, domestic violence, and other forms of abuse, it’s clear that resources are needed to help ministries and leaders care for these individuals with love, support, and in cooperation with civil authorities. This handbook seeks to help the church take a significant step forward in its care for those who have been abused.

Holcomb, Lindsey, and Justin Holcomb. Is It My Fault? Hope and Healing for Those Suffering Domestic Violence

Is It My Fault? is a message of hope and healing to victims who know too well the depths of destruction and the overwhelming reality of domestic violence. At least one in every three women have been beaten, coerced into sex, or abused in their lifetime. The effects of domestic violence are physical, social, emotional, psychological, and spiritual, and can have long-lasting distressing consequences. It is common for victims of domestic violence to suffer from ongoing depression and recurring nightmares, self-harm, panic attacks, substance abuse, and more. Is It My Fault? addresses the horrific issue of domestic violence with the powerful and transforming biblical message of grace and redemption. It deals with this devastating problem and sin honestly and directly without hiding its prevalence today.

Lamb, Warren. Behind the Veil: Exposing the Evil of Domestic Oppression and Providing Hope

Domestic oppression is the seedbed for every other form of abuse that takes place within families and churches. In Behind the Veil, pastor and biblical counselor, Warren Lamb, pulls back the veil on an evil that has been too long misunderstood and overlooked in Christian circles. Pastor Lamb draws on his thirty-plus years of specialized counseling experience with oppression and abuse survivors to train and equip the church—both leaders and laypersons—to effectively partner with Jesus Christ to “proclaim release to the captives…and to set free those who are oppressed” (Luke 4:18b).

Moles, Chris. The Heart of Domestic Abuse: Gospel Solutions for Men Who Use Control and Violence in the Home

Domestic abuse and violence are on the rise in our culture today, and just as prevalent in the church. With an estimated one-fourth of women in the church living with abuse and violence, pastors and biblical counselors need to have the resources to offer hope and help. It is time for godly men in the church to call abusive men to repentance and accountability. Here is a valuable resource for every church leader and Christian man.

Pierre, Jeremy, and Greg Wilson. When Home Hurts: A Guide for Responding Wisely to Domestic Abuse in Your Church 

When Home Hurts is intended to equip pastors, church leaders, and church members to respond with the heart of God to situations of domestic abuse that occur in their local church. Prioritizing the safety of the victim at all times, Jeremy Pierre and Greg Wilson seek to help you be the kind of church leader, church member, friend, parent, sibling, or neighbor who responds wisely. This very practical, pastoral book acknowledges the reality and the horror of domestic abuse, but also the reality and power of God to heal. It will be a helpful guide to anyone who suspects abuse within their church family, but is unsure how to help without making things worse.

Strickland, Darby. Is It Abuse? A Biblical Guide to Identifying Domestic Abuse and Helping Victims 

For years, biblical counselor Darby Strickland has served women in oppressive marriages. Now she writes to anyone who wants to help, regardless of their level of experience. You will learn how to identify the toxic entitlement that drives abusive behavior and to better understand its impact on victims—including children who are raised in a home with domestic abuse. Ultimately, you will become equipped to provide wise and Christ-centered counsel and to empower and advocate for victims while navigating the complex dynamics of oppression in a marriage.