A Brief History Lesson 

If you’ve read my blog over the past eighteen months, then you know that the modern biblical counseling world has been at war. Sadly, warfare between biblical counselors and Christian integrative counselors is nothing new, nor is it new to experience warfare among biblical counselors. David Powlison documented this long history in The Biblical Counseling Movement: History and Context. I also outlined some of those in-house disagreements here: Is It Biblical for Biblical Counselors to Disagree Publicly?: A History Lesson, and also here: Heath, Jay, and Donn…And Mischaracterizing Fellow Biblical Counselors.

The newest series of skirmishes began almost two years ago when Heath Lambert posted his now famous zombie-infected biblical counselor podcast. I waited and prayed for about a week, and then decided to wade into the conversation. You can find a summary of my engagement with Heath here: “What Makes Someone a Faithful Biblical Counselor?” 

Since May of 2024, the skirmishes have turned into relentless open warfare. Others—like Sean Perron, Dale Johnson, Greg Gifford, Omri Miles, and Francine Tan, to name just a few—have joined Heath in accusing fellow biblical counselors of not being biblical counselors.

To date, I’ve rarely been a target of the bombardments. And, of the 200-ish posts I’ve posted in the past couple of years, I’ve only “defended” myself three times (that’s about 1.5%, if my middle-school math is correct). Most of my engagements in these clashes have focused on my seeking to defend fellow biblical counselors who I believe are being falsely accused and grossly mischaracterized.

A “Truce”

The end of the Apostle Paul’s life has been a major motivator for me to speak up. Paul notes that, “at my first defense, no one came to my support, but everyone deserted me” (1 Timothy 4:16).

Back in 2016-2017, when Lambert made similar accusations against Eric Johnson, I spoke out in defense of Dr. Johnson privately, but not publicly. This time I have chosen to publicly defend my fellow biblical counseling brothers and sisters. It is certainly biblical to publicly defend ministers of the gospel and to publicly challenge public mischaracterizations: Proverbs 31:8-9; Esther 4:14; Galatians 2:14; 1 Timothy 5:20; 2 Timothy 4:16-18; Titus 1:10-13; Ephesians 5:11; Ezekiel 3:17-18; Nehemiah 5:6-9; Proverbs 22:10; Titus 3:9-11; Romans 16:17-18.

However, after much prayer, reflection, and consultation (Proverbs 15:22), I believe it is time for me to “call a truce”—at least on my part (Romans 12:18). When I privately and publicly asked for counsel about this, I had three types of responses:

1. If your soul needs a sabbatical, and the Lord is leading, then by all means, take a sabbatical.
2. If at all possible, please don’t stop speaking into this. We need your public voice.
3. Perhaps it is time for a sabbatical—on both sides—as it seems everyone has spoken…repeatedly.

I’ll continue to “monitor” the conversations—they come up on my social media feed whether I want them to or not. But, for some yet-to-be-determined amount of time, I plan to be an observer, not a participant.

I plan to keep doing all the other “free retirement ministry” I’ve been doing:

• Providing pro bono counseling to pastors and biblical counselors.
• Researching and writing, especially on issues like embodied-souls, traumatic suffering, and common grace.
• Blogging about the positive beauty of biblical counseling.
• Providing pro bono biblical counseling consulting to churches and para-church organizations.
• Being actively involved in my church.
• Being actively involved in my community.
• Enjoying the wife of my youth, our extended family, and our friends.
• Playing pickleball!

What will I do with my “extra” time during my sabbatical?

• Gaze on the beauty of the Lord (Psalm 27:4).
• Be still and know that God is God (Psalm 46:10).
• Sit at Christ’s feet listening to what He says through His Word and His indwelling Spirit (Luke 10:39).
• Let the peace of Christ rule in my heart and let the Word of Christ dwell in me richly (Colossians 3:15-16).
• Seek to walk by the Spirit, be led by the Spirit, filled with the Spirit, guided by the Spirit, and live out the fruit of the Spirit (Romans 8:14; Galatians 5:16; Ephesians 5:18; John 16:13; Galatians 5:22-23).

A Word to My Friends Who Are Experiencing Attacks 

A few thoughts, friends…

1. To Defend or Not to Defend? 

A biblical case can be made for publicly defending your gospel ministry against public attacks. Paul spent much of the Corinthian epistles defending himself and his ministry. While lesser known as a defense of his ministry, 1 Thessalonians 2 is another example of Paul documenting the veracity of his ministry. You are free, under the leading of God’s Spirit through His Word, to publicly defend your ministry, or, to remain silent in the face of mischaracterizations (1 Peter 2:19-23). 

2. God Has Your Back

Earlier, I quoted Paul at the end of his life grieving that “no one came to my support, but everyone deserted me.” Though it is incredibly painful when we lack all human defense, we can take that pain to the God who has our back.

“But the Lord stood at my side and gave me strength, so that through me the message might be fully proclaimed and all the Gentiles might hear it. And I was delivered from the lion’s mouth. The Lord will rescue me from every evil attack and will bring me safely to his heavenly kingdom. To him be glory for ever and ever. Amen” (2 Timothy 4:17-18).

Trust that your heavenly Father will rescue you from every evil attack. Trust that He stands at your side and gives you strength. Know that through your biblical counseling the message of the gospel is spreading. Know that you minister to God’s glory.

3. Keep Searching Your Heart and Keep Progressively Growing as a Biblical Counselor

Each one of us must have hearts open to the conviction of God’s Word and God’s Spirit. None of us have perfect models of biblical counseling. Let us all live humbly in alignment with the spirit of these words from the Introduction of the Biblical Counseling Coalition’s Confessional Statement:

“We confess that we have not arrived. We comfort and counsel others only as we continue to receive ongoing comfort and counsel from Christ and the Body of Christ (2 Corinthians 1:3-11). We admit that we struggle to apply consistently all that we believe. We who counsel live in process, just like those we counsel, so we want to learn and grow in the wisdom and mercies of Christ.”

A Word to My Friends Who Are Accusing Other Biblical Counselors 

A few thoughts, friends…

1. Consider a “Truce”

To me, it seems as if the accusations have been relentless for almost two years now. Podcasts, blog posts, journal articles, social media posts, conferences, etc. You have gotten your point across. Perhaps if you took a breath, people might be able to slow down and digest what you’ve said—and perhaps even listen and change where that may be needed.

As part of such a “truce,” perhaps consider what some of us have suggested—a biblical counseling conciliation summit. See here: A Proposal: A Biblical Counseling Conciliation Summit.

2. Consider Searching Your Own Heart

To me, there has been a lot of “speck hunting” and not so much “log looking” (Matthew 7:1-5). Perhaps this is a time for judgment to begin at home (1 Peter 4:17). Perhaps this is a time to assess your own heart and your own model of counseling.

The same week that these newer biblical counseling wars erupted, Shirley and I move into our new, idyllic home in Port Charlotte, Florida. We have loved almost everything about our new community. There is one thing we have not loved, and it relates to a person who I’ll name “Maximillian.” Max is a contrarian. While he has never spoken about or against me, he has spoken, ad nauseum, against our HOA BOD. If the BOD says, “The sky is blue,” then Max screams, “No! It’s green!” If the BOD says, “The sky is green,” then Max counters, No! It’s blue.”

Max does not have much self-awareness. When others recently pushed back on him, sharing that perhaps he is a large part of the problem, Maximillion responded with,

“My intention is not to tear anyone down but instead to provide loving, helpful feedback. In the process, this may ruffle some feathers because sometimes the truth is hard to hear.”

I believe that Max identifies as a Christian. Based on his quote, he seems to believe that he is speaking truth in love. However, other than a few of his compatriots, the vast majority of the residents of our community see neither truth nor love in Maximillian’s comments to and about our HOA BOD. He repeatedly mischaracterizes them in an angry, disrespectful manner.

To my friends who are accusing others, I know you believe you are speaking truth in love. Perhaps it would not hurt to read the feedback that others are providing you, search your heart, and ask whether you are being consistently truthful and consistently loving…

3. Consider a Positive Focus on the Beauty of Biblical Counseling

We know what you are against. You’ve told us…again, and again, and again.

Now, tell us what you are for. Equip us.

Let’s get back to the days of Randy Patten’s leadership of NANC (now ACBC) when, with a shepherd’s heart, Randy led NANC with a focus on sharing the positive beauty of biblical counseling.

Perhaps if you called a truce, you could expend your energy, time, focus, podcasts, conferences, blogs, newsletters, and journal articles equipping us to speak the truth in love so we all can grow up together in Christ.

A Word to My Friends Who Have Remained Silent 

I know many biblical counseling leaders who have strong views about these public accusations. Some of you have remained silent, even in private. Some of you have been publicly silent, but privately seeking to promote peace.

A few thoughts, friends…

1. Consider that Silence Is Not the Only Biblical Option 

From much interaction with many of you, you seem to perceive and present the idea that silence is the more biblical approach. Biblically, I believe there to be a range of Christlike options, including speaking out publicly (Proverbs 31:8-9; Esther 4:14; Galatians 2:14; 1 Timothy 5:20; 2 Timothy 4:16-18; Titus 1:10-13; Ephesians 5:11; Ezekiel 3:17-18; Nehemiah 5:6-9; Proverbs 22:10; Titus 3:9-11; Romans 16:17-18).

While it is true that when they hurled their insults at Christ, he did not retaliate (1 Peter 3:22), it is possible to speak out against public insults without retaliation, but rather in a spirit of truth. The four Gospel are ample evidence that Christ often publicly combatted the lies that people said about Him. And, as noted above, Paul frequently publicly defended the veracity of his gospel ministry.

Sometimes silence in the face of mischaracterizations can emboldened unending mistruths…

2. Consider Searching Your Own Heart Motivation Related to Your Public Silence

My motives in speaking out publicly may be pure. But that has not stopped me from searching my heart and seeking counsel from others.

Your motives in not speaking out publicly may be pure. But that should not stop you from searching your heart and seeking counsel from others—about your public silence.

The biblical counseling movement has become known for several categories of “heart searching.” Perhaps those categories might be helpful here.

• People Pleasing: We might ask ourselves, “Is my public silence possibly motivated by a desire to be seen as ‘a nice guy,’ to be known as ‘a peacemaker and bridgebuilder’?” “Am I perhaps motivated by a distaste for and unhealthy avoidance of conflict?” “Am I saying, ‘peace, peace,’ when there is no peace?”
• Fear of Man: We might ask, “Is my public silence possibly motivated by my fear of retribution—my fear of getting on the wrong side of this very vocal, very powerful group of biblical counseling leaders?” “Am I so afraid of being ‘canceled’ or experiencing some other negative consequences, that my fear is what is prompting my public silence?”
• Idol of the Heart: We might ask ourselves, “Have I perhaps made the modern biblical counseling movement such an idol, that I will protect it publicly rather than come to the defense of people being falsely accused?” “Have I made my preferred organization (perhaps ACBC) such an idol, that I don’t want to say anything publicly that is negative, even if it means that some fellow biblical counselors might continue to be publicly victimized?”

We ask our counselees to ask these types of searching heart questions. There’s no reason for us to be defensive and refuse to consider asking ourselves these heart questions.

During my sabbatical from these conflicts, I plan to (as I’ve been doing) ask myself a series of heart questions—using God’s Word to search the motives of my heart.

3. Reconsider Your Thinking on Responding to Public Mischaracterizations

Some silent ACBC leaders have said to me that no amount of engagement with conflict-oriented ACBC leaders is going to change their minds because they are set in their ways and not willing to listen.

Therefore, don’t engage with them. The first sentence may be true. The second sentence misunderstands the reason for engagement. I’ve not sought to change the minds of ACBC leaders. That’s God’s sovereign prerogative (2 Timothy 2:24-25). As I’ve stated many times, I engage in these conversations:

• For the Benefit of Mischaracterized Biblical Counselors: To biblically, theologically, and logically support fellow biblical counselors who are being publicly mischaracterized and maligned.
• For the Benefit of the Wider Biblical Counseling World and the Wider Evangelical World: To present a counter-narrative that shares a biblical model of relating to others with grace and truth, and shares a biblical theology of embodied-souls, common grace, the Creation mandate, physiological interventions, science, and research.

Others have quoted Proverbs 26:20 in an attempt to convince people that if we would stop responding, ACBC leaders would stop mischaracterizing people. “Without wood a fire goes out; without a gossip a quarrel dies down” (Proverbs 26:20).

First, that verse talks about gossip. It is not gossip to publicly present truth that contradicts public lies. It is truth telling. Isn’t truth telling a core tenant of nouthetic counseling?

Second, another core tenant of nouthetic counseling is that our response to people may impact/influence people, but never controls people—we are all responsible for our responses. So, it is anti-nouthetic and, more importantly, anti-theology to say that contradicting mischaracterizations forces people to keep mischaracterizing.

So Long, Farewell… 

In The Sound of Music, they sang about “so long, farewell, auf wiedersehen, adieu, goodbye, goodbye, I leave….”

At least for now, I say, “Adieu” to these counseling conflicts.

Farewell.

Fare well.

Be well.